MIMI

Hello Again.

This week I chose the title Mimi. Some may wonder why? Well, to be honest, I was a little stuck on what to write about this week so I decided to write a little about myself. I want to apologize for this post being longer than usual.

For the longest, I dreamed of being a writer on top of being a wedding cake designer but one of the things that has always stopped me was DOUBT. This platform has given me the ability to write about things that I often times think about. To recap some of the titles I used, I will explain why they are dear to me.

The first that I wrote about was the question, Why. I chose that because I always find myself asking why? Why do some relationships change, why people can’t be more kind, why sometimes me as a person I don’t think I’m enough, why sometimes I don’t think I’m pretty enough, strong enough, wise enough you name it. Why sometimes people see things one way and refuse to see all sides. The list can go on. With all of that leads the doubt.

The truth is, that I think some people may struggle with the same thoughts. Now I am in no way trying to tell anyone what to feel but for me what I come to learn is that I have to be enough for me, feel pretty enough for me because at the end of the day no one can do it for me. Also, that if I continue to let doubt get in the way I will never let the opportunity of seeing full potential come in. It’s not easy. With each day new struggles and anxieties come but I need to keep growing.

The next title was love. I wrote about love for Puerto Rico but overall LOVE is such a fundamental value that I wish was taught more. In my mind love can supersede so many things but it requires action something that sometimes can be lacking.

Following that was hopelessly romantic. I spoke again from my viewpoint not that of others. Chivalry still exists, I know. Yes, it shouldn’t be one-sided. A few people mentioned that they felt it went away when women did not want to be seen as lesser. The question still on hand is, does it mean that we throw away the kindness of perhaps holding the door for someone, saying thank you, going on dates, having actual conversations? All because as a woman we don’t want to be seen as weak or less? Again, please, I am not saying that all women feel this way.

Lost, may have been one of the post that was most dear to me because I spoke about my dad. Some may have felt that I was trying to tell people how to feel or that they should move on. That was not the case. Losing my dad was extremely hard. I still deal with it. Everyday we may hear or see something that may remind us of our dear loved ones. For me it helped to let my feelings out.

Last but not least was beauty beyond darkness. Certainly, for me over the years there was a lot of things that took place that seemed dark but over time I can now see the beauty.

It takes a lot to put myself out there and to in a sense be raw about what I feel and think. For me it’s not easy and perhaps for others it may not be either. I think that for me as long as I continue to ask why and seek for understanding, continue to put love into my life for myself, continue to look past the loss and hold on to memories, continue to see that romance may not be dead after all, that just maybe after all of that I will still be able to see the beauty beyond the darkness.

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